August is a special month in my family because four of us celebrate birthdays. My grandmother Fannie, who is no longer with us, was born on August 1st. My birthday is on August 12th. My niece Noelle was born on August 27th. Finally, my mother was born on August 30th. Two Leos and two Virgos all in one month. Even though Leos typically want the limelight, this month was all about the Virgos. This year, Virgo Season ruled supreme.
August 2025 was especially meaningful because my mother was turning 70 and entering a new decade of her life. I wanted to do something special, but as usual, I was working with a limited budget. I racked my brain trying to come up with ideas that were fun yet frugal. Dinner and a show or a staycation in Downtown Phoenix crossed my mind, but none of those plans felt quite right. I also considered a Caftan and Cocktails–themed party, but my mother quickly shut that down.
Planning Mom’s Milestone Birthday
Eventually, I decided to ask my mother directly what she wanted to do. As usual, she didn’t have a clue. All she asked for was a drink at a nice bar or speakeasy. I thought that sounded reasonable, but it was only one activity. It wouldn’t fill an entire day.
I reached out to my brothers to see if they had suggestions or could contribute, but they were either strapped for cash or busy managing their own lives. So I continued planning on my own. All summer, I researched shows and hotels, but nothing felt like the right choice. My gut instinct kept telling me to wait.
When August arrived, I became anxious. Time was moving fast, and I still didn’t have a plan.
When Inspiration Finally Arrived
Thankfully, about two weeks before my mother’s birthday, my sister-in-law Felicia texted me to ask what I was planning. I explained my ideas, budget, and indecision. She immediately started offering suggestions.
First, she suggested flying my mother to Chicago to visit her sister Linda. I had considered this earlier in the year, but not for her birthday. I vetoed it because my aunt is very ill, and my mother felt uneasy visiting her alone. It didn’t feel like the right atmosphere for a milestone birthday.
Second, Felicia suggested flying my brother Kahlil to Arizona. Nice idea, but we both felt Mom would want to see the whole family. And since money was tight, flying everyone out wasn’t possible.
Finally, she offered a perfect solution: fly my mother to Minnesota so she could celebrate with them, attend Noelle’s party, and enjoy time with the entire family. It was the ideal mix of celebration and connection. My mother loves to travel and loves spending time with her grandkids, so this felt exactly right.
Booking the Trip
Once the plan was set, I needed to buy a one-way ticket for my mother and a round-trip ticket for myself. Thank goodness for Afterpay or Affirm because that made everything possible.
After the tickets were booked, Kahlil reached out asking what Mom wanted to do and where she wanted to eat. I asked her again so I wouldn’t guess wrong. Her only requests were a piece of steak and a good drink. I also reminded him that she wanted to visit a speakeasy.
Flying to Minnesota
The days leading up to the trip were exciting. My mother packed several days early, laying everything out in the guest bedroom to make sure she had everything she needed.
On Thursday, August 28th, we took an early flight to Minneapolis. We wanted to arrive the day before Noelle’s party, which was scheduled for Friday afternoon.
Noelle’s celebration was held at a family entertainment center with bowling, arcade games, and plenty of activities. Family and friends came out to usher her into her eighth year of life. We started with bowling, and let me tell you—WE SUCKED!! Gutter balls everywhere. We laughed the entire time.
After bowling, we sang happy birthday, ate pizza and cake, and let the kids loose in the arcade. Two hours flew by quickly, and soon we were packed up and heading home.
Gigi’s Big Day
The next day was Gigi’s birthday. I woke up early, got dressed, and enjoyed the quiet until everyone else got up. My mother joined me first, and we waited for my brother and Felicia to come downstairs with the itinerary.
Gigi glowing in her red dress as she opens her birthday gift—her favorite author’s latest book. A sweet Virgo Season moment.
Around 11 a.m., they revealed the plans. Kahlil had taken the lead and organized a full day of activities. I quickly changed into a cute dress because I realized I was underdressed.
Our first stop was a large art gallery housed in a downtown Minneapolis warehouse. Local artists filled the space with every style of art imaginable. After a couple of hours browsing, we ended our visit in a honey shop overflowing with honey products. We tasted so many varieties we left on a sugar high.
Next, we headed to Barcelona Wine Bar for a late lunch. We ordered a mix of tapas and savored every bite of those Mediterranean and Spanish flavors.
Afterward, we visited Char Bar, a speakeasy I had hoped Mom would enjoy—and she did. Hidden in the back of a restaurant, it was dark, moody, and full of character. We ordered drinks, including mocktails for Felicia and me, plus appetizers and desserts. Everything was delicious, especially the desserts. We bobbed our heads to old-school hip-hop and enjoyed every moment.
Hand-drawn cocktails and creative descriptions—Char Bar’s drink menu set the perfect mood for Gigi’s birthday speakeasy stop.
Our final stop was a rooftop bar downtown. I don’t remember the name, but it was crowded and full of energy. We ordered drinks, waited for a table, and eventually settled in to watch the sunset. It was the perfect ending to the day.
A Perfect Virgo Season
Overall, I think Kahlil and Felicia planned a fantastic day. Every activity was something my mother genuinely enjoys, and the pacing worked beautifully for her energy level. We started at a reasonable time and ended early enough to spend the evening with the grandkids.
The entire weekend was filled with love, laughter, and simple joys. I think we created memories she will hold onto forever. This Virgo Season was definitely one for the books.
Nestlie and Gigi enjoying the good vibes at Char Bar—pretty dresses, great drinks, and even better memories during our Virgo Season celebration.
I’m always striving to find fun and unique places to take my mother for special occasions, and Mother’s Day this year felt like the perfect reason to try somewhere new. As I’ve mentioned before, we are a family of tea lovers, and I’m constantly on the lookout for a new tea spot in the Phoenix area. Fortunately, I keep a running list of places I want to visit.
After reviewing my list, I decided on The Pink Door Tea House for this year’s Mother’s Day outing.
First, it was affordable. Many of the tea rooms on my list seem nice, but they’re a bit out of my price range.
Second, it had a charming old-fashioned tea room vibe. The website photos showed floral tablecloths, antique tea cups, and delicate doilies. It reminded me of the first tea room, The Spicery, that we visited with my nieces back in 2021.
Third, it was located in Glendale, which is closer than most of the other spots on my list.
Lastly, it was one of the only places still accepting reservations for Mother’s Day. Even booking a month in advance, it was tough securing a spot. I snagged a reservation by the skin of my teeth.
Dressed and Ready to Celebrate
On Mother’s Day, Mom and I got all gussied up in our finest spring outfits. She wore her favorite red dress, and I donned my new green one. She had a fresh haircut, and I had my new braided style. We made a pretty mother-daughter duo, if I do say so myself. We gathered our purses, hopped into our trusty chariot, and headed to our destination.
A quick car selfie before heading to The Pink Door Tea House for our Mother’s Day tea date.
First Impressions
Since there’s no street parking available, we used the free lot less than a block away. After checking our faces one more time in the car mirrors, we strolled up to the front of the venue and were immediately stopped by a long line spilling out of the doorway. They were clearly booked and busy with families celebrating their moms.
The Pink Door Tea House Exterior
While we waited to check in, we took pictures in front of the house. They had several cute vignettes set up for photo ops. Even though the displays were adorable, some looked a bit worn, dusty, and dingy. My mother and I made sure not to touch or sit on anything so we wouldn’t get dirty. I snapped several photos of her to commemorate the occasion. She looked lovely in every pose.
My mom posing in front of one of the outdoor vignettes at The Pink Door Tea House during our Mother’s Day outing.
Inside the Tea House
After taking photos, we finally made it to the front desk and checked in. A few moments later, we were seated. The inside was packed, but everyone seemed to be in a festive mood. Each table was decorated with a unique tablecloth and an eclectic mix of tea sets, utensils, and dishes.
Inside the tea house, every table had its own charming mix of tablecloths, tea sets, and vintage details.
Our waitress greeted us and took our tea order. Since I had already chosen the Garden High Tea option when booking, we didn’t need to order anything else. Five minutes later, she returned with teapots filled with our choice of piping hot tea. Shortly after, she brought out our strawberry walnut salads, which were a light and tasty start to our tea experience.
Tea Time and Treats
As we waited for the next round of treats, we took more pictures and people-watched. We also soaked in the décor, which featured an assortment of mismatched patterns and fabrics that reminded me of visiting Grandma’s house on a Sunday afternoon.
One of the table setups of the day, complete with pink tea sets and vintage details.
Soon, our two-tier tray arrived with an assortment of finger sandwiches, chocolate-dipped strawberries, mini pastries, and scones. We made sure to try a little bit of everything.
Final Thoughts
Once we had our fill of scrumptious food, our afternoon tea experience came to an end. All in all, we had a lovely time. The staff was attentive, friendly, and punctual. The establishment was clean, and most importantly, the food was tasty.
I would definitely recommend The Pink Door Tea House to fellow tea lovers. I plan to visit again in the future.
If you didn’t already know, I truly enjoy giving gifts. There’s nothing like the feeling of finding the perfect present for someone you care about. To me, it’s an art form — one I’ve almost mastered. But every now and then, the universe throws me a challenge, and this past spring was no exception.
A Milestone Birthday… and a Blank Mind
A friend of mine was turning the big 5-0, and I wanted something special to honor her new season of life. The only problem? We had only known each other for about a year and a half. I thought I knew enough to pick the perfect gift, but apparently, I was very wrong.
Searching for Inspiration (and Striking Out)
Pinterest to the Rescue… or Not
After racking my brain for what felt like an eternity, I turned to Pinterest. But nothing grabbed my attention — not a single thing.
My Go-To Gift Websites Failed Me
Next, I visited one of my favorite sites, Gifts.com, which usually helps you narrow gift ideas by category. But I struck out there, too. No inspiration. No spark. Nothing.
With only two weeks left before her birthday, I was at my wit’s end. I decided to give my brain a little break.
The Eureka Moment
A few days later, I sat down and reflected on everything I knew about my friend. I replayed every conversation in my head until it hit me:
She LOVES to travel.
She takes several trips a year, always plans ahead, and even had an upcoming European adventure to celebrate turning 50.
A travel theme was clearly the way to go.
Let the Gift Hunt Begin
A Travel Coffee Table Book
I headed straight to Amazon, the land of endless possibilities, to search for travel-themed gifts. My first idea was a beautiful coffee table book so she could discover new places to explore. I chose Best in Travel 2025 because it was current, colorful, and full of unique destinations.
A Travel Photo Album
My next idea: a travel scrapbook. But since my friend isn’t big on crafting, I went with a simple, stylish photo album. It held 160 photos and included lines for captions — perfect for preserving memories without any fuss.
A Travel Journal
Because she enjoys writing, I added a linen-covered travel journal with prompts and space for photos. It was compact enough to slip into her bag for on-the-go storytelling.
Rounding Out the Perfect Gift Bundle
Setting the Mood: A Candle Warmer
Even though the travel items made a lovely gift, I wanted something to add warmth and ambiance. That’s when I thought of a candle warmer. I pictured her turning on the soft glow while she flipped through the travel book. I added a lavender candle with the phrase “The calming scent of planning another trip” embossed on the glass. Perfect.
The Final Touch: A Travel Backpack
Instead of a standard gift bag, I decided to purchase a stylish travel backpack to hold everything. It felt on theme and practical — cute enough for weekend trips and spacious enough for a 17” laptop, three packing cubes, and more. The black and cream design sealed the deal.
I added everything to my cart and felt completely satisfied with my selections.
Delivery Day: A Gift from the Heart
My order arrived two days before her birthday. I arranged each item carefully inside the backpack and then made a personalized card with a little help from ChatGPT, of course.
When I surprised her with the gift, she burst into tears. Her birthday had started off shaky because she’d unexpectedly had to cancel her European trip. She was devastated, but my gift became a bright spot in her day.
I couldn’t have been happier.
The Joy of Giving
There is nothing like making someone’s day with a thoughtful, intentional gift. Her joy reminded me why I love gift-giving so much: it’s not about the price tag — it’s about the heart, the creativity, and the intention behind it.
Because sometimes a new hairstyle is cheaper, and way more fun, than a convertible –
They say a midlife crisis starts with a shiny red sports car. Mine started with a deep sigh in front of the mirror and a stubborn bun that had overstayed its welcome. After six years of playing it safe with the same tired hairstyle, I was ready for something bold. Something fresh. Something braided. What began as a simple quest for a new look turned into a full-blown midlife hair makeover, one twist, one braid, and one confident smile at a time.
A Hair Crisis of My Own
Lately, I’ve been going through my version of a midlife crisis. However, instead of buying a new sports car, I’m doing new things with my hair. Let’s just say I’ve been a little unhappy with my appearance since moving to Arizona, and I was in desperate need of a change. To understand this sudden shift, I need to take you back to the beginning of my midlife hair makeover.
The Beginning of a Hair Love Story
For starters, I’ve always been a hair girl. It began with my grandmother, Fannie, taking me to the salon when I was five. We had a standing appointment every two weeks on Friday afternoons with Miss Maggie. I would get a press and curl, Shirley Temple curls to be exact. It was a bonding moment for us both, and I loved it! Little did Grandma know, she was creating a mini hair diva.
High School Hair Drama
By high school, my mother had found a more modern hairstylist named Carol. I was nervous at my first appointment because Miss Maggie’s Vigorol relaxer had caused significant damage, and I feared Carol would have to chop most of my hair off. To my surprise, she was able to save most of it and give me an updated style. My hair flourished in her hands. Even though she was pricier and I couldn’t visit as often, I was happy with her care and skill.
Losing and Finding My Hairstylist Again
During college, I lost contact with Carol after she lost her shop in a legal battle and had to relocate. I started doing my own hair or trying new stylists in Baltimore, and needless to say, the results were disappointing. One stylist even used a super-strength relaxer that caused severe breakage. I was devastated.
Fortunately, after five years, my mother ran into Carol’s daughter at the grocery store and got her new contact information. I was ecstatic. Carol was shocked by the damage but helped nurse my hair back to health over the next couple of years.
Eighteen Years with Karen: Style Meets Stability
After some time, I wanted a change. Carol was amazing, but she wasn’t into the latest styles and was taking fewer appointments. My mother had found a new stylist in 2000 named Karen, whose salon was just ten minutes from my job. She was modern, skilled, and attentive. I started seeing her and stayed for over eighteen years.
Every two weeks on Friday after work, I’d head to her salon. Even though one reason I started seeing Karen was to try new styles, I ended up wearing the same look most of the time. When my hair began thinning due to androgenetic alopecia, there wasn’t much I could do.
Going Natural: A Turning Point
In 2007, I decided to embark on a natural hair journey to save my hair. Karen supported me throughout the transition, and together we learned about natural hair products and techniques. It was the early start of what would later become my midlife hair transformation.
By the time I moved to Arizona in 2018, my dermatologist had helped me understand my condition and what products worked best for my hair. Unfortunately, keeping it healthy meant keeping it simple. That didn’t leave much room for experimenting with new looks.
New State, New Challenges
Finding a good Black hairstylist in Arizona was difficult. Back home in the DMV, salons were everywhere, but here, they were few and far between. Even when I did find one, I couldn’t afford regular visits since I was unemployed for a while.
So, once again, I became my own stylist. Arizona’s dry air and hard water were brutal on my hair, causing more shedding than ever. Eventually, I found products that helped, but my hair still wouldn’t hold a style. That’s when the bun became my default. What I thought was temporary turned into my everyday look for six years.
Side BunTop Bun
The Bun Years
Over time, I grew increasingly unhappy with my hair. I didn’t want to cut it, but I couldn’t style it the way I wanted. My frustration came to a head in November 2024. I was planning a trip to visit my niece in Minnesota and wanted to look nice, different.
I decided to get braids, despite my dermatologist’s warning about tension and synthetic hair. I researched low-tension styles and proper maintenance before settling on Esther at Monarch Beauty Services in Phoenix. I didn’t realize it then, but this decision would mark the start of my midlife hair makeover journey.
The Braided Comeback
For my first braided style, I chose medium, mid-back island boho twists, low tension and easy to remove. I was nervous, but Esther and her assistant were gentle and understanding of my fine hair and tender scalp.
When they finished, I looked like a new woman. My scalp was slightly sore but not painful, and my hair looked exactly like my Pinterest inspiration. My mom loved it, and my family in Minneapolis showered me with compliments.
Boho Twists – Front ViewBoho Twists – Back View
I kept the braids for six weeks, double what I’d planned, and my hair remained healthy afterward. Taking them down took five hours (and an entire season of Severance), but I followed TikTok’s take-down tips carefully, and my edges stayed intact.
Finding My Arizona Stylists
A few months later, I wanted another cute style, a two-braid look. Esther was honest and said it might not work on my fine hair, but I still believed it could. I found another stylist, Charity at Braidz4Dayz, who specialized in crochet and thinning hair. She said yes, and I booked my appointment.
The day of my appointment, I was nervous but determined. Charity’s suite was professional and spotless. Ninety minutes later, I looked in the mirror and felt transformed. The braids were lightweight, flattering, and everything I envisioned. She instantly became my new go-to stylist.
I’ve visited Charity three times since that first appointment in April. The feed-in braids have become my signature, they flatter my face, don’t stress my hair, and work for any occasion. Best of all, they take under two hours to install.
Confidence Restored: My Hair, My Peace
This midlife hair makeover has truly been one for the books. It’s kicked off a new chapter in my life, a style evolution. I’m thrilled to have found a look that works with my delicate hair and makes me feel confident again.
Next, I’m on a quest to find a skilled stylist who can safely heat-style my natural hair. Once I find that magical person, I’ll finally be content.
Turning 50 felt like a milestone that deserved a celebration, but with money being tight, I didn’t expect to do anything extravagant. My plan was simple—enjoy a solo weekend doing things I loved, quietly ushering in my 50s. I wasn’t disappointed by the idea. In fact, I was looking forward to it.
Then, about a month before my birthday, my sister-in-law gave me the surprise of a lifetime—she invited me to Minnesota for the weekend, covering my ticket and planning something special. I was beyond touched. Not only was I going to spend my birthday with family, but I had a feeling that more surprises were in store.
And I was absolutely right. What I thought would be a simple weekend turned into an unforgettable celebration, filled with love, laughter, and moments I’ll cherish forever. Let me take you along on the journey of how my 50th birthday became more magical than I ever imagined.
Arriving in Minnesota
I arrived in Minnesota on Thursday, excited to spend a relaxing weekend with family. That evening, things were quiet, and my sister-in-law didn’t give away any details about what was to come. I assumed we’d have a nice, low-key weekend together—maybe go out for dinner or do a little sightseeing.
But little did I know, the real surprise was waiting for me the next morning.
Friday: The Perfect Kickoff
The celebration started with a Friday morning brunch, which I thought would just be a simple meal with my family. But as soon as I walked in, I was met with an incredible surprise—my closest friends and family were all there, waiting for me!
Kendra, Marguerite, and my cousin Kola had all flown in just to celebrate with me. I was stunned. Marguerite had even rearranged her own vacation and birthday plans to be there. Kendra, despite her fear of flying, pushed past her anxiety and got on a plane just for me. And Kola, ever the thoughtful one, brought her two daughters and even made personalized party favors for the occasion.
Marguerite and Kendra
I was overwhelmed with joy. I had come to Minnesota expecting a small family gathering, but instead, I was surrounded by some of my favorite people in the world.
After the amazing surprise at brunch, we headed to Paisley Park, the legendary home and studio of Prince. As a lifelong Prince fan, this was beyond exciting. Walking through the space where he created so much iconic music, seeing the memorabilia, and hearing the history behind the legend was surreal. It felt like stepping into a piece of music history, and I soaked up every moment.
That evening, we wrapped up the day with dinner at a food hall in downtown Minnesota. The atmosphere was lively, the food was delicious, and the conversations were filled with laughter and memories. Sitting there, surrounded by love, I already knew this birthday weekend was going to be one for the books.
Saturday: My 50th Birthday
The big day arrived, and my sister-in-law had even more fun planned!
We started the morning at a Black open-air market, where we explored local vendors, admired unique handmade goods, and supported Black-owned businesses. The energy was vibrant, and it felt amazing to be in such a lively space with my friends and family.
Next, we visited Hunt & Gather, a huge thrift store that was unlike anything I’d ever seen. This wasn’t just any thrift store—it was a treasure hunter’s paradise! The store was packed with eclectic finds, antiques, vintage pieces, and unique oddities. I could have spent hours sifting through the treasures, discovering cool and quirky items.
Of course, no trip to Minnesota is complete without stopping at the Mall of America. Even though I had been there before, it was still fun to walk around, take in the massive scale of the place, and do a little window shopping.
As the day wound down, we got ready for my birthday dinner at a fancy restaurant. Everything about the evening was perfect—the ambiance, the food, and the company. Sitting at that table, surrounded by my closest friends and family, I felt so incredibly grateful and loved.
But the surprises didn’t stop there. When we got home, my sister-in-law brought out a stunning birthday cake in all of my favorite colors. It was the perfect finishing touch to an already incredible day. We gathered around, cut the cake, and shared in the sweetness—both literally and figuratively.
A Birthday Filled with Love and Gratitude
Looking back on that weekend, I can truly say that my 50th birthday was more than I ever could have dreamed of. The love and thoughtfulness poured into every moment made me feel so incredibly special and appreciated.
I never imagined that so many people would go out of their way to make this milestone birthday unforgettable. From the friends who traveled miles to surprise me to the family who planned every detail so thoughtfully, I felt surrounded by love in a way I’ll never forget.
Turning 50 didn’t just mark a new decade of my life—it reminded me of how lucky I am to have such amazing people in my corner. The love, laughter, and unforgettable memories of this weekend are gifts that I will cherish forever.
If this is what 50 looks like, I can’t wait to see what’s next.
Lately, I’ve been completely obsessed with watching TikTok videos about adult coloring books. I’ve probably watched hundreds of them—mesmerized by the way artists effortlessly bring black-and-white pages to life with vibrant colors and stunning blends. It all looked so relaxing, like the perfect hobby to unwind after a long day. I was convinced that with the right supplies and a bit of inspiration, I’d be able to create something just as beautiful.
So, I jumped in headfirst. I purchased two Fuzzy Hygge Super Cute Coloring Books for myself and my mom, a pack of 120 Caliart alcohol markers, and some white gel and acrylic pens from Amazon. As soon as my supplies arrived, I eagerly flipped through the pages, choosing a cozy Christmas scene by the fireplace as my first project. I imagined myself sinking into a peaceful coloring session, watching the page transform beneath my markers.
But reality didn’t quite match my expectations.
Fuzzy Hygge Coloring Book
Expectations vs. Reality
Coloring Day 1: High Hopes
After watching countless videos of people creating beautiful works of art, I thought I was ready. I saved instructional videos on techniques like using alcohol markers, creating patterns, and adding dimension through shading and highlighting. The videos made it seem so easy, so relaxing.
I was inspired to dive in and start coloring my first picture. I knew in my heart of hearts that I could execute these techniques with ease since I’m a creative spirit. I thought that creating an artistic masterpiece on my first attempt would be a breeze. Boy was I in for a rude awakening.
First, it took my mother and I over two hours to swatch the 120 colors from my new marker set. This task was a bit tedious and time consuming to complete. However, this had to be done before we could begin coloring because the colors on the caps didn’t match how it looked on paper. Although it took a while for us to finish, I’m glad we did because it saved us time when it came to coming up with a design and choosing our colors.
After we finished swatching all the markers, I pulled the colors that I needed to use on the page. Since it was a Christmas themed page, I decided to go with red, green, white, and yellow as the main colors. For the fireplace, I chose various shades of brown and orange.
Original Christmas Page Before Color
Once I was satisfied with my color choices, I began to plan how I was going to design the picture. It seemed simple enough, but it required way more thought than I bargained for. First, I had to decide where I was going to place all the yellow highlights that represented the glow from the fireplace. Next, I had to figure out how I was going to tackle the fireplace. I made sure I practiced on a sheet of scratch paper first making sure the colors coordinated well with each other. Then, I had to execute the plan on the coloring page. I started with the flame in the center like I saw in all the videos. I quickly came to the realization that my markers don’t blend like the ones in the videos because they don’t have a brush tip. I was very disappointed in the final result because it didn’t look as smooth and professional as the one in the videos.
After the flame fiasco, I was leery about continuing with the rest of the fireplace, but I started cautiously coloring the bricks in the pattern I laid out on the scratch paper. Fortunately, it worked out well. The fireplace was shaping up nicely despite the shaky start with the flame. The bricks looked really nice. They looked authentic. I was very proud of my progress so far. It gave me high hopes for the rest of the page.
Coloring Day 2: Disaster Strikes
Unfortunately, the completion of the fireplace wore me out. So, I decided to stop coloring for the day and come back to it at another time when I was fresh and full of energy. Little did I know that the next two coloring sessions would not be as fulfilling as the first.
I chose to color the wall behind the fireplace and the floors during my next coloring session. I started with the floors. I re-watched the videos I saved on coloring the hardwood floors before I began coloring them in. I slowly added the brown to the floors. Then, I meticulously started adding the lines depicting the wood grain. I was nervous the entire time, but they actually looked good once it was all said and done.
Since the floors turned out so well, I felt encouraged. I decided to do a pattern for the wall. I wanted to do something simple yet fitting for a Christmas theme. I ultimately landed on a cute Christmas tree pattern on a beige background. I practiced it on a scratch piece of paper like before and felt ready to begin.
I laid down the base coat of beige and it complimented the fireplace and floors perfectly. Then, I had a fleeting thought that maybe I should stop there, but I decided to be bold and take a chance with making a pattern. I immediately regretted attempting the pattern once it was done. The trees looked a hot mess. Apparently, I became less consistent with the size and spacing of the trees as I was drawing them freehand across the page. As a result, the page looked sloppy and busy. I was so distraught and disappointed that I had to stop coloring for the day.
Coloring Day 3: Rushing to Finish
The next day, I was determined to complete the picture. I was actually tired of looking at it and was worried I was going to mess something else up on the page. Although I had colored in quite a bit of the page, I still needed to color all of the little things like the plant, candles, tea pot, and picture frames. Self-doubt caused me to hesitate with every decision. I was so afraid of ruining the picture after the disastrous wall pattern that I barely wanted to touch the page.
After staring at the page for a mighty long time, I slowly but surely started coloring the smaller areas on the page. I was terrified that I was going to make a mistake. Fortunately, I colored all of the items well.
I finally reached the last large area on the page which were the feet and blanket. Analysis paralysis set in again. I couldn’t decide what pattern I wanted on the socks or blanket. Therefore, I visited my coloring book collection on TikTok again and watched examples of the same page repeatedly until I made a decision. I finally landed on a simple alternating green and red pattern for the blanket, three different red and green patterns for the socks, and red and green color schemes for the mugs. I finished with the entire picture before nightfall. I was unhappy with the end result, but was too tired to care. So, I closed the book for the night and decided to give it a rest.
Coloring Day 4: Mischief Managed
The next day, I opened the book and just stared at the offending patterned wall. I knew something had to be done about it immediately. I ultimately decided that I needed to cover it up. I pulled various markers from my set and started trying different colors until I found one that complimented the page and was dark enough to cover the trees. I prayed it would work. Otherwise, I was going to be upset.
Fortunately, it worked perfectly. The green covered the trees nicely. You could still see the faint shadows of the tree pattern underneath if you looked hard enough, but the overall effect was quite nice. I felt relief when I saw how well the cover-up worked. The picture looked much closer to what I originally envisioned. I could finally put my pens up and be done with that page.
Page ProtectorBack of Christmas Page
Final Product
Challenges and Solutions
Color Palette Selection: Keep it simple. Use inspiration from Pinterest or choose monochromatic palettes.
Overthinking Design Choices: Avoid overcomplicating designs. Sometimes, simple and neat pages are just as beautiful.
Analysis Paralysis: Limit the amount of inspiration you consume to avoid feeling overwhelmed.
Small Wins
My second attempt, a cat in bed scene, turned out better thanks to a simple color palette.
Reflecting on mistakes helped me improve.
I learned to accept mistakes as part of the process.
Original Page Before the ColorCat Coloring Page Sheet Protector
Final Page After the Color Was Added
Lessons Learned
Perfectionism: Mistakes happen, and that’s okay.
Comparison: Develop your own style instead of trying to replicate others.
Patience: Talent doesn’t equate to instant expertise. Practice is key.
Back of Bunny Coloring PageBunny Page Sheet ProtectorOriginal Final Bunny PageBunny Page With FilterBunny Page With Mistake
Conclusion
I assumed I’d excel at adult coloring right away, but it humbled me. With time and reflection, I’ve learned to enjoy the process. Ultimately, adult coloring can be relaxing if approached with a childlike spirit. Therefore, keep it simple, and don’t overthink it.
Have you tried adult coloring books? Share your experience in the comments below!
As an auntie, I love finding creative ways to connect with my nieces and make them feel special. Recently, I decided to try my hand at making some cute artwork that they could hang up in their bedrooms. It was a fun and easy project that allowed me to express my creativity while also creating something personalized just for them. In this post, I’ll share the process I used to create the artwork and the joy it brought to my nieces when they received their special gifts.
Coming up with Noelle’s art was a breeze because she had already requested the Miraculous Ladybug picture over a month ago. All I needed to do was research pictures of the character in order to draw something she would like. Of course, I visited YouTube in order to find some inspiration and how-to tutorials. After viewing and saving several videos, I decided to go with a simple tutorial by Draw So Cute. I liked this particular picture because it was easy to sketch. Plus, the drawing resembled the picture of Noelle in her Ladybug costume.
In addition to the picture of Ladybug, I decided to add her sidekick Tikki to the picture as well. I added Tikki because the picture looked plain without another character from the show standing next to her. Tikki turned out to be an adorable addition to the picture.
Once I figured out how I was going to draw Ladybug and Tikki, I had to decide what to draw in the background. My original thought was to draw the Eifel Tower since the show is set in Paris, France. I actually found several basic tutorials to help me achieve my goal. Unfortunately, the final sketch didn’t look great and I had to come up with something else to salvage the project.
The Result
In the end, I decided to cut out the drawings of Ladybug and Tikki and place them on a black background. Next, I printed the title “Miraculous: Tales of Noelle and Tikki.” I made sure I placed a ladybug over the O in miraculous because that is how it looks in all of the examples that I have seen online. Finally, I print and cut out pictures of ladybugs and hearts to add to the background since I didn’t have the Eifel Tower on the page like I originally planned.
Noelle’s Ladybug Artwork
I think the final product turned out great. I just hope she likes it when she finally lays her eyes on it.
Ayla’s Artwork
The Process
Trying to find inspiration for Ayla’s picture was a little more difficult because she is a few years older than her sister and is outgrowing kiddie drawings. I had to put a lot of thought into what would be a more age appropriate picture to create for her that would fit her style. After a lot of thought, I decided to make her a fashion sketch of a girl in a cute outfit because she is a little fashionista.
After I made my final decision, I scoured Pinterest and Instagram for ideas. I found several ideas on Pinterest and narrowed it down to one picture that I thought Ayla would like. I chose this particular picture because the girl was wearing an outfit I thought Ayla would appreciate.
I colored the picture and cut it out once I finished sketching it. I was a bit nervous about the face because the color was a bit patchy and off. Ultimately, I thought it would be fine and proceeded to transfer it to a pink piece of cardstock. Finally, I found some stickers in my stash that looked lovely in the background.
The Result
The final picture looked fun, floral, and cute enough for a 10 year old girl. The flowers that I chose were a bit on the tropical side, but somehow looked nice alongside the sketch. The phrases I used on the picture looked nice, but I wish I had some different ones to use instead. I would have preferred more fun statements to use, but I didn’t have a lot to choose from in my stash. Oh well. Maybe next time. It’s still cute though.
Ayla’s Fashion Sketch
Final Thoughts
These drawings were cool to create. I enjoyed the creative process and was proud of my creations. Most importantly, I was able to create a sweet personalized item for my nieces that I hope they will cherish for many years to come.
It’s been a while since I’ve made a Pen Pal With Me post, but I’m finally at a place where I can send a few letters to my close family and friends. The recipients of these letters are my Cousin Kola and my bestie Kendra. They are both very special to me and I really wanted to send them some pretty happy mail.
After a lot of thought, I finally settled on a few themes for my letters. It took me a while, but I was able to come up with two very different designs that stretched my creative skills. I decided to wait til my spring break to design my snail mail in order to give myself time to make something unique for the two of them.
The Design Process
Kendra’s Letter
For Kendra’s letter, I was going for a vintage vibe. My initial idea was to use the craft paper envelope as a background for vintage stickers, washi tape, and scrapbook paper. However, as I started going through my stash, I quickly realized that I didn’t really have a lot vintage supplies to go with my theme. Therefore, I had to come up with another idea that fit with the supplies I had to work with.
It took a long time for me to land on a different idea, but I finally stumbled upon some washi tape that was the foundation for my design. Ultimately, I decided to do something very classy and glam based on the colors gold and black.
Envelope Art
For the envelope, I created a grid pattern using the washi tape. I based this design on a video by Cat’s Planner on YouTube. Once complete, the pattern turned out to be a wonderful backdrop for the black and gold stickers I used to embellish the envelope. The addition of the flowers, hearts, and phrase really made the design pop.
Kendra’s Black and Gold Envelope Art
The Inside Pocket
The pocket was simple to create. First, I measured and cut the black backing to fit the size of the envelope. Second, I made the pocket out of a gold metallic patterned cardstock that I had in my collection. I affixed it to the backing using my tape gun, pressing it down firmly to ensure that it stayed in place. Finally, I decorated the pocket with black and gold stickers for a polished final touch.
Black and Gold Pocket
Kola’s Letter
The theme for the second letter was spring flowers. This letter was much easier to complete because I had all of the supplies necessary to create this design (I have flowers of all shapes, sizes, and colors coming out of my ears). I was able to easily decide on a floral pattern scheme based on the washi tape that I used for this project.
The Envelope
I used the same grid pattern on Kola’s envelope that I created on Kendra’s. It turned out just as pretty as the first design. However, it had a different vibe because of the floral pattern. After I finished the grid, I decorated the rest of the envelope with white flowers and a blank pink and blue area to add her name.
Kola’s Floral Envelope Art
The Inside Pocket
The pocket for Kola’s letter was fairly simple to make. I used the same process to create the envelope using pink cardstock for the backing and a floral patterned piece of paper for the pocket area. Since the pattern on the pocket was a bit busy, I chose not to add any additional embellishments to the pocket.
Floral Pocket Design
Letter Contents
The Letter
Inside each envelope, I placed the following items:
A personal letter.
A set of questions.
My answers to the questions.
A fun random fact.
A playlist of songs that I’m currently listening to this month.
Goodies in Kendra’s Letter
The Pocket
Inside each pocket, I placed the following items:
Stickers
Scrapbook paper
Stationery
Washi tape samples
Goodies in Kola’s Letter
Note: I was a little nervous to add the crafty materials to Kendra’s letter because those items aren’t really something she uses often. However, in the end, I thought it would be a cute idea to send them anyway. I wanted her to have the full experience of what it’s like to receive one of my letters full of goodies. Hopefully, she can use the items to create other pen pal letters or find other craft projects that could use some fun decorations.
Final Thoughts
Although it took me a while to create these letters (3 days to be exact), I truly adored how each letter turned out in the end. Kendra’s letter looked retro and classy, while Kola’s letter looked soft and feminine. I can’t wait for them to receive their letters and get their reactions.
Some people believe that artificial intelligence, or Ai, will eventually create art that is indistinguishable from that created by humans. Others believe that Ai-created art will be its own distinct form of expression. But what is Ai art, and what does it look like? Is this the furture of art? Let’s take a moment to explore this new artistic frontier.
How is Ai Art Created?
Ai art is created by algorithms, or sets of rules, that are written by humans and then executed by computers. The algorithms can be very simple, or they can be quite complex. Ai art can be completely abstract, or it can represent things that we see in the world around us. Sometimes, the algorithm is designed to create a specific type of art, such as a landscape painting. Other times, the algorithm is designed to create whatever art it can, without any specific goals in mind.
Bride image created with the help of Ai
Some people believe that Ai art is a new form of expression that will eventually replace traditional art forms. Others believe that Ai art is simply a tool that humans can use to create new art, just as we have used computers to create new forms of music or film. What do you think?
Advantages of Ai Art Compared to Traditional Art
Efficiency
Ai art has a number of advantages over traditional art. Firstly, it is more efficient. Traditional art can be very time-consuming, and often requires a lot of materials. With Ai art, you can create a work of art in a fraction of the time, and with far fewer materials. This is because you can create an artwork using computer software, which is much faster than traditional methods.
Bubble girl image created with the help of Ai
Accuracy
Secondly, Ai art is more accurate. Traditional art can be subject to human error, which can ruin a work of art. With Ai art, you can create an artwork that is perfect in every way. This is because computer software can create perfect shapes and lines, which is not possible with traditional methods.
Versatility
Thirdly, Ai art is more versatile. Traditional art is often limited to a certain medium, such as painting or sculpture. With Ai art, you can create an artwork using any medium you like. This is because you can create an artwork using computer software, which can be used to create artworks in any medium.
Holiday image created with the help of Ai
Accessability
Fourthly, Ai art is more accessible. Traditional art can be expensive and difficult to obtain. With Ai art, you can create an artwork using any computer, which makes it much more accessible. This is because you can create an artwork using computer software, which is widely available.
How Ai Art is Changing the Art World
This type of art is changing the art world because it is opening up new possibilities for what art can be. With Ai art, artists are no longer limited by their own skills and knowledge; they can now create art that is beyond their own ability. This is allowing artists to create new and unique pieces of art that would not be possible without the help of artificial intelligence.
Fall image created with the help of Ai
Ai art is also changing the way that art is valued. In the past, art was often valued based on the skill of the artist or the rarity of the piece. However, with Ai art, the value of a piece of art is often based on its uniqueness or its ability to provoke thought or emotion. This is because Ai art is often created with the intention of being different from other pieces of art.
The art world is changing rapidly with the advent of Ai art, and it is becoming clear that this new form of art is here to stay. Whether you think it is good or bad, there is no doubt that Ai art is changing the way we think about art and its value.
My Experience With Ai Art
Before I started my journey creating Ai art, I had viewed many pieces of Ai art via Instagram. I thought they were phenomenal to say the least. I didn’t even realize that some of the images were created with the help of Ai. They were that good. I had to do a double take and read the caption in order to deduce that it was actually generated via Ai software. I was completely blown away with how well the Ai was able to create art with such accuracy.
Gilded Age image created with the help of Ai
My First Ai Art Pieces
I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would have the opportunity to create my own Ai artwork, but as luck would have it, my cousin Kola decided to gift me a subscription to Creative Fabrica Spark during the month of November. Needless to say, it was the BEST GIFT EVER!
When I finally logged into my account on Thanksgiving Day, I decided to research how to properly write a prompt in order to achieve my desired results. I studied the prompts of the art that was available on the site in order to get a feel of what was required. The basic formula was to state the topic of the art (Santa standing in the snow), elaborate on what you want it to look like (colors, hair texture, skin color, background, etc…), and state the artistic style or medium you want it to use in order to create the image (Picasso, Norman Rockwell, Andy Warhol, digital, etc…).
My First Ai Piece of Artwork
Once I finally felt comfortable enough to start, I decided to create a piece of artwork which represented an African American grandmother cooking in the kitchen in the style of Norman Rockwell. I tried to make sure I described her outfit, hair, and the kitchen in detail.
After I completed my prompt, I pressed the ignite button and eagerly awaited my results. The images that were generated were quite interesting to say the least. Most of them look distorted. There were limbs missing, eyes in the wrong place, and hands with extra digits. I was a bit disappointed, but I didn’t give up.
Grandma images created with the help of Ai
My Second Attempt
I then decided to tweak the prompt a bit and pressed ignite again. My next set of images were slightly better, but not by much. The kitchen in the background was more to my liking and the grandmother didn’t look like Sasquatch. However, it still wasn’t as nice as some of the artwork I had viewed on the site.
Ultimately, I spent the better part of my day refining my prompt trying to get the image right. Eventually, I decided to cut the kitchen out of the prompt altogether and just focus on making the grandmother look right. It took a minute, but the Ai finally rendered some images that were decent.
Grandma images created with the help of Ai
Final Thoughts
Fall image created with the help of Ai
Although I spent a long time on perfecting my first prompt, I wasn’t discouraged. As a matter of fact, I was thrilled to try it again. I really wanted to see what else it could do with other subject matter. Clearly, it was capable of producing quality art. I just needed to practice writing my prompts so that the Ai could create what was in my head.
The Verdict
Snow Queen image created with the help of Ai
It has now been two weeks since I started creating Ai artwork and I have to say that I have improved tremendously. I have prompted it to make everything from wedding dresses to mermaids yielding some fascinating results. Some of it looks fantastic, while the rest looks questionable. However, I have learned that this is the nature of Ai. It is still in training. Therefore, it is not going to produce impeccable artwork 100% of the time.
Finally, I just want to say that I love using this new tool to create art. I think with time, it will just get better and better the more we train the Ai. It is a fun way for both non-artists and traditional artists to express themselves. I definitely feel it will take the art world to new heights. With Ai, their is no limit to what can be created.
First, let’s address one of the many elephants in the room. Despite the article’s name, I’m not fond of being around children, especially small children. When it comes to interacting with kids, my motto has always been that I prefer children walking, talking, and potty trained — usually, age three and up. I only like being around infants for short periods of time. This requirement hasn’t changed much over the years. Until recently, when I had to make an exception to the rule. It’s so funny how life always has a way of throwing you a curveball that changes your mind and heart.
Okay, so let’s take a look at another fun fact that you should know about me before we get into this heartwarming story. Plot twist! I have no children of my own by choice. Therefore, being around babies has not been my thing since my younger brother was a baby (he and I share a special bond too). Now that I have gotten this piece of critical information off my chest, let’s proceed with this touching tale. I’ll go back to the beginning to where all this started to give you a bit of perspective about my situation.
The Back Story
Back in the fall of 2017, I had a mental health crisis, which led me to take long-term leave from work for the rest of the school year (I was a teacher for 22 years. I bet you didn’t see that coming.). Anyway, when it was time for me to return to work the next school year, I wasn’t mentally ready, but my mounting bills insisted I go back to work to survive.
About a week before I was scheduled to return to work, my baby brother, Kahlil, called, making a very passionate plea for me to quit my job and move to Arizona to live with his family and focus on getting better. He feared that I would damage my progress or much worse if I went back to work before I was fully healed.
At the end of the conversation, I was touched by his offer but gracefully declined for many reasons. A week later, I was back at work struggling to maintain my sanity. Teaching will do that to the strongest amongst us. So, imagine what it was doing to a person like me who was riding the mental struggle bus.
As it turns out, my brother was right all along. (Please don’t tell him I said that. I will never hear the end of it.) Two months after our conversation, I had several meltdowns at work and home, which led to a final crippling situation one morning in the school parking lot. It was the last straw that forced me to call my mother and leave work and my entire professional life for good.
Uprooting My Life
After I had calmed down (because I was utterly hysterical and sobbing) and mustered up the nerve to pull out of my job’s parking lot, I drove to my mother’s house. She had already been on the phone with Kahlil. The two of them agreed that I needed to quit my job immediately. Unfortunately, that meant that I would have to leave my apartment and temporarily live with someone until I got better. Moving back home to my mother’s wasn’t an option because she had sold her house a month before and was heading to Arizona to live with Kahlil. Therefore, Kahlil’s offer was back on the table. I had no other choice but to move to Arizona to live with his family. (We moved six weeks later, at the beginning of December 2018.)
Before my mother and I officially moved to Arizona, my brother would jokingly say that he would buy me an emotional support pet to help with my recovery. For those of you that don’t know about this form of therapy, according to the American Kennel Club, “Emotional support animals (ESAs) refer to dogs and other pets that provide emotional support and comfort to their owners on a daily basis.” Emotional support animals do not undergo formal training, but their owners/handlers benefit from having them around. ESAs help people manage anxiety attacks or fight depression (esadoctors.com).
Of course, I didn’t find his declaration the least bit funny. Because not only did I dislike being around children, but I truly disliked animals even more (Another fun fact about me. Aren’t I just chock full of surprises today?). Sure, I can view animals at a safe distance at the zoo or pet store, but I do not want to live with one. EVER!
To my dismay, a few months after we moved in, my sister-in-law brought home a dog one day after visiting a friend in Tucson. Needless to say, they found out the hard way that I have no interest in animals, no matter how sweet and cute they may be. During the short time Luna lived in our household, she and I had very few interactions. I was relieved when they decided to return her to the original owners. (My family finally came to their senses and realized they aren’t pet people either.)
Now that I have given you some background information, back to the regularly scheduled program.
Adjusting to a New Life
Anyway, I was initially apprehensive about my brother’s offer because he had three young children ages 1–9 at the time. Being around children is a major trigger for me since I was a teacher for so long. As a matter of fact, in one of my final therapy sessions, the therapist stated that I have PTSD from my job, which was a true eureka moment for me because it was an accurate description of how I felt when I thought about work and children. So, as you can imagine, I was nervous about moving to Arizona to live in a house full of people, three of whom were kids.
Honestly, I tried to think positively about the situation initially. I actually thought I would form more of a bond with the older children, Ayla, age five, and Kage, age nine. They met my prerequisites of being potty trained, walking, and talking. Plus, I had positive interactions with them when they visited us back home in DC. Therefore, I thought hanging out with them might be fun.
The baby, Noelle, on the other hand, was another story. She definitely didn’t meet any of my requirements. She cried all of the time, had just started walking, was still in diapers, was still speaking baby babble, and had a slight mean streak (For the record, her parents say the same thing about her, so I’m allowed to say it too). She was my absolute worst nightmare when it came to being around a child for a prolonged period of time. Not to mention, my one interaction with her earlier in the year wasn’t all unicorns and rainbows. Noelle was about seven months old at the time and was a tough cookie who only wanted to deal with her parents. She cried most of the day she was with us and was visibly relieved when her parents arrived to pick her up later that day.
Boss Baby Was No Joke
Fast forward to December of 2018, Noelle is one, walking, and feistier than ever. She is absolutely not fond of having two new people in her world and wasn’t afraid to express it via the most epic temper tantrums that I have ever witnessed. Noelle absolutely hated it when her parents would place her in our care and leave the house for a few hours. She would instantly drop to the floor and roll from wall to wall to express her discontent. She appeared to be possessed. It was actually fascinating to watch. If we tried to pick her up to console her, her screams turned to blood curdling screeches. Her wails could rival a banshee.
By now, you can clearly see that she wasn’t fond of grandma and me in the beginning. It would take over six months for the two of us to build a relationship (six exceptionally long and trying months). Can you see my eyes rolling right about now?
I spent the next few months trying to adjust to my new life in Arizona and a house full of people. Noelle’s cries at night didn’t help the situation. She was literally tap dancing on my last remaining nerve, and I didn’t know if I could survive with the noise. (If I failed to mention that I’m noise sensitive at the beginning, now you know.) So, imagine how I felt being awakened by her cry at 3 am. Let me tell you; it was traumatic, to say the least. My mental health was practically hanging on by a very thin string that was getting thinner by the minute.
As time marched on, Noelle cried a little less at the sight of me, and I cringed a little less at her presence. Eventually, she would allow me to pick her up and comfort her when her parents weren’t around. If her parents were around, I was persona non grata.
We Finally Bonded
Slowly but surely, our bond started to form unbeknownst to the two of us. I can’t pinpoint the exact moment when we became inseparable, but I know it was a series of events that led us down the path of becoming besties.
First, she started coming to me when she wanted to be held. I would pick her up and hold her as she would drift off to sleep. To my surprise, I found holding her very soothing. Listening to her soft breathing and feeling her heartbeat as she slept in my arms was comforting to me. These quiet moments appeared to be good for both of us.
We next bonded over cartoons and animated movies because I was the only adult in the house who could watch them indefinitely and not lose my complete mind. I found them quite soothing to my soul. Therefore, I would sit next to her on the sofa for hours and watch them repeatedly without going batty. We would sing and laugh all day as we watched the same shows over and over again. Her giggles warmed my heart.
Another bonding moment happened over our love for snacks and juice. It became our thing. She would come to me for snacks or a sip of my juice, which annoyed her health-conscious dad. He would admonish me for giving her unhealthy food. But I think that’s why God blessed people with aunts. What kind of aunt would I be if I didn’t spoil her and give her junk food from time to time? I adored how she would light up each time she saw me with a special treat. I loved seeing her smile.
FYI…I taught her how to say please that first year, which was a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, she learned basic etiquette and how to be polite in making requests. On the other hand, she learned how to weaponize the word please quickly to get what she wanted. She even taught herself to tilt her head, bat her pretty eyes, and add a mischievous grin for good measure. Who could resist that? Needless to say, she would get her treat almost every time with her newfound tactics.
Joined at the Hip
By the end of our first year together, we had grown so close that I gave her the nickname of Lil Poo Poo (don’t judge my nickname game). She also started talking more and started calling me Aunie (This was her way of saying Auntie, minus the “t.” Don’t judge her. She was still learning how to talk). The sound of her calling for me was precious. She would call out for me, and I felt like I was an essential part of her life and world.
As we entered year two of our living arrangement, she and I interacted more and more. Her sister, Ayla, started bringing her to my room in the morning as her parents slept. I think this started because Ayla thought I was the only adult awake, and I was a safe person to take care of Noelle. It was quite funny because it started to feel like a daycare drop off situation. Ayla would knock on my bedroom door around 7 am, I would open the door, and she would have Noelle on her hip. Ayla would then hand Noelle to me and either go back to bed or head downstairs to watch tv. I would then take Noelle and turn on one of her favorite shows.
The entire situation was very amusing. Ayla’s small act unknowingly started a pattern that further tightened my bond with the baby. This morning ritual was the catalyst for giving me a little purpose in life. I started looking forward to waking up and hearing Ayla’s knock on my door. Eventually, Noelle was old enough to come on her own. Every morning I would try to be awake, showered, and fully dressed by the time she arrived at my door. I wanted to be ready for our day. After she knocked, we would proceed downstairs for her favorite breakfast of oatmeal. We sat in comfortable silence as we ate our breakfast and watched something on our tablets while enjoying the peace and quiet of the early morning hours.
At times, I felt like Noelle and I shared a more profound connection. It was so uncanny how she knew when I was down because she seemed to knock on my door at just the right moment and say, “Aunie, downstairs.” Even though I didn’t need to be downstairs, she missed my presence, and that was all I needed to brighten my mood and day.
How Did She Become My Emotional Support Baby?
As our auntie/niece relationship started to blossom, my brother and his wife began to refer to her as my emotional support baby. My mother even said that we had imprinted on each other. At first, it was a funny running joke, but I think we all began to realize there was some truth to both statements over time. Now, we have come to embrace the term emotional support baby and feel it is a blessing.
I never considered in a million years that being around this small human being would brighten my mood and help with my major depressive disorder, but it did. Noelle has played a significant role in my recovery by just being a tiny, defenseless child learning about the world. Having her depend on me when her parents weren’t available gave me purpose and joy. Having her rely on me for her overall well being and basic needs as she developed helped me fight a little more for my recovery each day. In general, she was good for my mental health and spirit.
Experiencing Womb Fire
After this experience, I can finally understand how some people have children to fill a void. They think kids will give them unconditional love, provide them with purpose, and make them happy. As I held Noelle in my arms or interacted with her daily, I felt a sense of calm, purpose, and fun that I haven’t felt in a while.
Additionally, I can also comprehend how some people experience womb fire, which, according to Urban Dictionary, is “The reaction or feeling a woman has to an adorable baby that makes her want to have a baby. Hence, her womb is on fire.” I guess, in my middle years, I could see myself being a mother. It was a very fleeting feeling, but I felt it for a fraction of a second as I held Noelle. Then, of course, Noelle would do something gross and annoying like poop or cry, jolting me back to reality, confirming my choice not to have children.
Two years have gone by, and unfortunately, our time together has come to an end. My brother has decided to go back to school to become a chiropractor. (Darn him for being ambitious and wanting a better life for him and his family. LOL!) His chiropractor school is in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Alas, my mother and I won’t be traveling with them. We will remain in Arizona for a while longer. As you can imagine, I’m incredibly sad, to say the least.
During the two months leading up to their departure, I spent as much time with Lil Poo Poo as I possibly could. Everyone was concerned about how either one of us would react once they moved. We had become inseparable. I think it will be harder on me than her because she is still young enough to forget about our time together, the longer we are apart. I, on the other hand, will always remember the two years we spent together.
I have to admit I shed a little tear at the thought of her leaving in private but tried to stay strong in front of the family. On her last day in Arizona, we spent the day eating her favorite things and doing her favorite activities. Later that evening, my mother and I drove Noelle and her sister back to their parents and had one final family meal together before they drove off on their next adventure the next day. I gave her one last bear hug before they drove off in their car. My heart sank a little as we pulled off in the opposite direction.
Final Thoughts
Just in case you are still wondering how Noelle saved my life after reading this story, here it is in a nutshell. She gave me purpose and hope. Spending time with her everyday required me to focus on someone other than myself. I was forced to live in the moment and not dwell on all of the sad thoughts that are constantly running in my head. Waking up and taking care of her was the kind of good therapy that money can’t buy. Not to mention, the quality time I spent with my niece is PRICELESS.
Plus, life didn’t seem as grim through her bright eyes, and that made all the difference in my life.
I’m telling this story a day after they have hit the road for Minnesota. Writing this story has helped me deal with this shift in my life. We plan to FaceTime (my least favorite thing to do) and stay in contact as much as possible. I fear she will forget me over time. I’ll just become that distant auntie she sees on holidays and other special occasions. Even if that happens, I’ll always fondly remember the two years we spent together and the happy moments we shared. I’ll watch her grow up and be proud. No matter how old she gets, she will always be my Lil Poo Poo, and I’ll always be her Aunie.
I’ve never been the type of person who felt the need to chronicle my life, thoughts, or feelings in a diary or journal. I’m not compelled to verbally share my emotions; therefore, I don’t have any desire to write them down in a book for safekeeping.
As a child, I remember having a small diary around the age of ten or eleven. I don’t recall how it looked in great detail, but I recall it had the typical diary look with a tiny lock on the front, which held it together. It even came with a small key to lock it tight for safekeeping.
In my young mind, I was supposed to pour my emotions into my diary and lock it with a key so that no one would be able to read my secrets. I guess I received this idea from television, books, and magazines as a young girl and assumed that all girls enjoyed doing this activity.
Naturally, I thought that I would use my new diary in the same way. Writing my little heart out at least once a week, maybe more depending on my mood, feeling satisfied when I completed my entry. Then I would read it sometime later and relish in some fond memory or have a good laugh.
However, this was not the case for me. I had grossly underestimated how much I had no desire to write my thoughts down into this book. I found it to be useless. It felt like a chore without a reward at the end. I felt no joy or release once I completed my entries. It should be no surprise that I only made a few entries and abandoned the diary altogether.
Fast forward thirty-five years, and I’m in the throes of a mental breakdown. I’m a complete mess, a bucket of water, and totally non-functional. I’m also on long-term leave from work, taking medication, and visiting a psychiatrist regularly, desperately trying to pull myself together and get my life back in order.
During an appointment with my new psychiatrist, he noticed that I wasn’t very forthcoming with information. He expressed that I needed to share more details about my emotions in order to diagnose my condition. He suggested that I jot down my thoughts, feelings, and concerns between our appointments and bring them to our next meeting. That way, it would give me a few talking points to share during our session.
Over the next month, I wrote down a few notes in my small spiral notebook at the end of each week. Needless to say, I didn’t have much to write down. My life was pretty dull. The only thing I felt was sadness, fear, and anxiety on a daily basis. My feelings didn’t change much from day-to-day. During my bi-weekly sessions with the doctor, I would share my thoughts, but they failed to shed any new light on my issues.
Pinterest to the Rescue
Then one day, as fate would have it, I was performing my daily ritual of scrolling through Pinterest, and I stumbled upon a pin entitled “Bullet Journaling for Mental Health and Self-Care.” The pin caught my eye because it referred to both mental health and journaling. But what really intrigued me was the phrase bullet journaling. It was utterly foreign to me, and I wanted to learn more. So, I clicked on the pin, which led me to a blog post about the topic.
I spent five minutes completely engrossed and enthralled by the information in the article. I learned that Ryder Carroll created the bullet journal as a means to organize your life. It was a simple system that allowed the user to manage their daily schedules, lists, and other various ideas into one notebook. However, his original idea had morphed over the years and had taken on an entirely new identity with a creative spin and could even be used to track one’s mental health.
By the end of five minutes, my mind was totally blown. The bullet journal seemed like a powerful tool to help me on my journey to mental wellness. Most importantly, it was the creative outlet that I didn’t know I needed in my life. A light bulb went off in my head. I had an energy surge that I had not felt in a long time.
As my excitement grew, I decided that I needed to learn more about bullet journaling and use it to help myself. I proceeded to go down the rabbit hole of Pinterest and was continuously razzle dazzled by the beautiful spreads people designed for mental health. The possibilities seemed to be endless. The bullet journal examples had everything I needed and more to improve my state of mind and spirit. This journal was just what the doctor ordered.
After climbing out of the Pinterest vortex, I dived right into the black hole known as YouTube, to find more bullet journaling information. I spent the better part of the day viewing video after video on bullet journal themes and set-ups. It was utterly fascinating how people took such a simple concept and turned it into so much more.
Once I had viewed every video imaginable, I was utterly convinced that using a bullet journal to track my mental health was a step in the right direction. I hadn’t been this excited about anything in a long time. For some reason, the idea of doing this journal ignited my passion for both art and organization.
The very next day, I planned how I wanted to design my journal from charts to themes. I already owned a fair amount of art supplies to get me started, so my order was small and affordable. I ordered three journals from Amazon, plus a few stencils to get me started.
It took only a few days for everything to arrive. I decided to use one of the smaller journals for mental health only, and the larger one would be used to organize other aspects of my life. I immediately started to layout the designs in my mental health journal because I was eager to use it. I decided that each month would have an inspirational quote, calendar, mood tracker, habit tracker, and four pages to record my weekly thoughts. Each month would have a theme, and I would use the charts daily. Since I started in the middle of November, I didn’t need a lot of space. I used a fall theme, which was cute but predictable.
Once it was complete, I was happy with the result. I tracked my daily moods and habits each day for two weeks and wrote down my thoughts weekly. By the end of the month, I shared my journal with my doctor. He was impressed. He had never heard of bullet journaling. He was thrilled that I had found a unique way to monitor my mental health. He was so impressed that he shared it with his supervisor next door.
By now, you might be wondering why I feel that bullet journaling was therapy for my soul. The answer is quite simple. The bullet journaling’s creative aspect sparked a fire inside of me that had died out a few years earlier. Creating and using the bullet journal gave me a new purpose. On the practical side, it provided a way for me to track and analyze my mental health.
I used my bullet journals consistently for nine months until it was time for me to return to work. I can safely say that it was nine months well spent. Bullet journaling rekindled my passion for arts and crafts. It also gave my idle mind and hands something to do while I was home from work.
In the end, I only used my bullet journal for a short time, but it made a tremendous impact on my life. Unlike the diary I had many years ago, I periodically look back at it from time to time to admire my work and read my thoughts from that period in my life. I recommend bullet journaling for anyone who needs a way to track their habits, ideas, and feelings. Even if you create a simple journal, it’s still worth a try.
Compared to my February letters, my March pen pal with me letters seem drab. Nevertheless, the show must go on.
I only created two pieces of happy mail for the month of March. I decided to keep things simple and use the same green botanical theme that I used for my March bullet journal design.
Take a moment to check out my snail mail ideas for the month of March below.
Envelope Art
The art work which appears on the envelopes for this month are an extension of the art I created for my March bullet journal. For my Aunt Linda’s envelope, I drew vines and leaves in green and black all around the envelope.
For my Cousin Kola’s envelope I went with panda and bamboo art.
Snail Mail Flipbook
For Kola’s happy mail this month, I created a bifold flipbook. A flipbook is basically a folded piece of craft paper which is decorated with various stickers and other embellishments. The idea is that the recipient can “flip” through the hand crafted book and find all types of goodies inside.
Flipbooks can be created in a variety of ways. View the video below to see how some pen pal flipbooks are made.
Since the main color for this month is green, I made sure I used the color to create the flipbook. I added touches of pink flowers and patterns to round out the design.
Additionally, I added pockets to both sides of the bifold flipbook to hold the letter and stickers which I added to the letter. The end result was a lovely pink and green card filled with small gifts for my cousin.
***Special Note***
Even though these letters are considered “flat” and fit nicely inside of a regular mailing envelope, they still cost more than a basic stamp to send. Be forewarned, the more paper and embellishments you add to make your letter visually appealing, the heavier it weighs. Therefore, you will always have to go into the post office to see how much postage needs to be added in order to mail your letter off.
Final Thoughts
I’m happy with the snail mail I created this month. I learn a little bit more each time I create and send my pen pals a letter. I’m also pleased with the fact that I was able to create something new this month and use up more of my scrapbook supplies. I’m looking forward to creating something new and different next month.
What do you think of the flipbook? Tell me in the comments below.
